Time has a way of moving both fast and slow. Any day can feel like an eternity or an eye blink depending on any number of factors. The future, for me, almost always feels so far off but then looking back the past seems like everything happened so quickly. Now here I am, pushing ever closer to whatever reckoning awaits.
I'm not writing today to talk about what might come. I work to be in the mode of "Que sera, sera". That is whatever will be, will be. That's not to say don't plan and all that but also I'm in no rush and try to have little worry about what the future might bring. This is more challenging currently, however I leave that to another blog.
Similar with the past. There's no need to worry or dwell on what might have been or what could have been. Instead the past is strewn with learning opportunities and ways to live more fully. An array of facts that can be leveraged into growth.
So here I am in the present, feeling at a summit of sorts. The primary focus of my journey over the last 18ish years has been that of trying to get my kids raised into capable adults. This came with certain "rhythms" to life: school, parenting schedules, sports schedules, etc. It was quite the regiment. A regiment that is now in transition. My son has been at college for nearly a year and my daughter is around less as she is busy with work and friends and figuring out her next steps.
This change in life is resulting in both more "me" time as well as thoughts of what life might have in store for "empty nest" Joe. I am starting to ask the questions of what is important and what can I maybe start letting go of? While this thinking is still a big ball of clay being shaped I do know there are several areas I'm taking larger consideration of.
First on this list is my living situation. This neighborhood and house have done us well over the last 15 years. However, I think I'm ready to let go of a number of things. The first is the yard. I'm just going to say it: yard work, I think it's time we see other people. Some people relish in keeping a tidy picturesque greenspace. I don't ever think I've been one of those. I'd rather be strolling amongst some nature than pushing the mower over my space, whacking weeds and doing what I can in the time allotted while I get a lovely scowl from captain and Mrs. parade of homes next door. It all seems contrived and stupid in this day and age; being some kind of mini-tenant farmer of grass and the occasional inedible plant. Okay, I know I technically own my house, so "tenant" is a misnomer still I think I only really need this plot if I was still growing potatoes and clamping turf.
Ranting aside the yard, and the rest of the house, need some updating. My yard is more pitted and cratered than a teenager's cheeks making leveling in order. Also, a fair amount of landscaping is due to improve the overall look. Frankly, I got over shoveling and all that years ago. Something about always being asked to shovel and move rocks and woodchips (you requesters know who you are).
There are some outdoor aspects I enjoy having at the house. Namely, my little garden patches where I try to grow stuff that's actually useful, i.e. fruits and veggies. Still this is one of too many hobbies. The gardening is enjoyable but really need to make use of yield. However you can only eat so many cherry tomatoes before you get really tired of them. I do have a small strawberry patch though and never tire of that, although it probably needs a dig out and replant. It's a good thing I have all that shoveling experience from my youth. To quote William H. Macy in Mystery Men, "I shovel well". Sigh...
Next on the list of things I could do with less of is square footage. Aside from laundry and the occasional drum jam/solo, I spend little time in my basement. Frankly, it's nearly a whole other house beneath me that sees minimal use. My daughter's room is down there, but she's here 50%ish of the time and within 18 months of moving off for college. Not to mention her favorite bed is my main floor couch.
The temperature regulation "down there" is also dreadful, particularly in the winter. It's a walkout, which is lovely, but again much work would be needed to make for a desirable utilization. I do envision a patio, perhaps three-seasoned in with a hot tub but again this is more to maintain when my ultimate goal is less.
I also like the idea of using the basement partially as studio space. I have much of my music stuff set up down there already and could move my office/eBay setup out of it's current room; my daughter's original bedroom. She might like it back up here too as the room is very toasty in the winter. I spent much time and energy getting rid of the old paneling and refreshing the space. Temperature, and the 75% completed bathroom, it is a nice space.
I've also considered renting the space and would even set up a kitchenette to make it largely independent from the upstairs. Laundry would still need to be shared and I would need bedroom access to get to the breaker box, but it would be a nice space for someone. Ultimately, I can live with less square footage.
Beyond the lawn and square footage there is a lot of "big" maintenance that is likely needed. As one might joke there are some days I think we need to "lift the roof, replace everything underneath and then replace the roof" (credit my dad for that one). Indeed the roof needs to be replaced in the near future. The woodpeckers also love my house so the exterior could use some upkeep. My windows and doors are largely original and not very efficient. Also, over the years my house has developed a sag/settling. If I wanted to be meticulous I would strip back the subfloor and relevel the joists. I'm not sure I'm willing to go this far however rehanging doors and windows that have been pulled out of square/plumb will likely be necessary. Again, sigh...
Lastly, more minor and turning to the outside again, my deck is in need of a refresh. My thinking at the moment is that it is structurally okay with no joist rotting but the decking and steps are soft and in need of replacement. Fortunately, this is a manageable project that I will tackle this summer.
I'm sure if I were to sit and ponder long enough there are enough other things with my "nest" that I could change or do without. Ultimately, life is complicated enough as it is and adding more things at this point seem it would only be a source of irritation and frustration.
I can't help but feel that it's close to time to just sell and find something more in line with what works for life moving forward. Until then, anyone want to help me with a deck, or lawn leveling or pouring a patio or laundry :) .
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